Square Peg in Round Hole...Accepting Yourlself

Image by mind the goat via FlickrTrying to fit in where you don't fit in can create problems.  Let's face it we all want to be accepted but many times we are looking for acceptance from people are who are not like us.  Maybe they are the cool crowd, or the artsy crowd, or the older group at school.  The list goes on and on.

The problem being is they these other people will never truly accept you beucase you dont accept yourself.

If you feel like a square peg and you are desperately trying to fit in a round hole then its really never going to work and you will find out sooner or later that you are only fooling yourself.

The best thing to do is to find a group that you is like you, that will accept you for who you are and what you are and not worry so much.  If you tend to be a total individual that only parts of you fit in various groups then there is nothing wrong with belonging to many different groups as long as you feel you fit in and not forcing yourself in there.



Image via Wikipedia
I look at Meowth on Pokemon.  He is the only Pkemon that talks.  He has given up all his powers as a Meowth in order to evolve himself to a higher power that allows him to talk.  He does not fit in with other regular Pokeman and so has found a place with Jesse and James of Team Rocket.  Here is is accepted without question and treated as an equal.  He also gets to be his real self without having to force himself to by someoen else to be accepted.






This seriouslly reminds me of the No Rain Video by Blind Melon where the Bee girl has to look all over before she finds a group she really fits into.

Information is Free...USE IT

Image via CrunchBaseOne thing the internet has done for the world is freed information.  Even the wikileaks thing is all about freeing informations. 

So with all this information out there and with Google being so easy and helpful to use the solutions to your problems are only a click away. 

I recently was booking a flight for my dad and the cost was goign to be about five hundred dollars booking it on a Monday.  After a little research I found out that if you book it on the less traveled days like Tuesday thru Thursday you can save a lot of money  So we booked it on Tuesday and got the ticket for half price.  Great deal and all it took was just a little information

The right information can do wonders.  It can make you aware of traffic so you can get to work on time.  It can make you aware that you diet is wrong and help you get fit and lose wait.  But there you have to warned about disinformation.  This is falsh information that is out there.  For example let's say you are looking for a new camera and you go on a few sites and read the reviews.  A lot of reviews are written by peope who don't even have the product.  They are hired by marketing companies to go on sites like Amazon and write false reviews.  They do this with movies too. 
So if all possible try to get you information from various sources and when you see they all say the same then you can pretty much say you have the right information.

Karma: when you hurt others you hurt yourself

Image by Thomas Hawk via FlickrIts the law of karma then when you do something bad to someone in the end it will come back to get you and you will wind up hurting yourself.

Breaking the Rules...Bypassing Road Blocks

Image via WikipediaThere's always a way around things....


The last few days I've been hit with a lot of interferences and road blocks.  Starting with a photoshoot I did last week where the pictures were a lot different in the computer than on the camera screen.  I decided to turn them all black and white and they looked good.  This was my work around.

Yesterday I was getting off the on ramp on the freeway that had a lot of traffic.  I was in the merging lane and I saw and open and I put my blinker on.  But the guy in that lane soon sped up and blocked my entrance into his lane.  I tried to go faster but he went faster.  I was running our o road and soon I was driving on the shoulder.  I went faster he went faster till eventually he had to stop because of the traffic but I decided if I'd gone this fare driving on the shoulder I might as well go all the way since there wasn't a cop in sight I knew I was okay.  I only had to go a few hundred feet or so to get off again.  I was going on a detour to avoid the traffic.  So I made it and I left the angry guy in the track somewhere behind me.

What I realize is sometimes there is just an easier way around things.  The guy in the truck was blocked and limited by the boundaries of the other cars in front of him and to the side and he could not get into the shoulder where I was cause I was blocking him...by hurting me he hurt himself.

So I have learn to break the rules a bit.  Not all the time but seeing that there are alternative routes to get things done and to get what we want.  Going mainstream can be clogging because that is the way that everyone knows and everyone is there trying to get what you want.  But finding a less traveled road can work a lot better because you just get there faster.  In the end you might even marvel that you did something different and got around the road blocks while everyone else is still a mile back in traffic.

My Astroscope: Uranus transits the Third House

Image via Wikipedia

Uranus

By Transit

As Uranus transits the Third House, a person is freed from many aspects of the conditioning, which have formed his reality. At this time he tends to question and reject much that, hitherto, he has accepted without question. There is frequently, an enhanced interest in occult and psychic matters, especially if H 3 is tenanted. The discipline and structure of formal education rarely has much appeal at this time, as the mind is restless and questioning.

Relationships with others, particularly those who were part of the environment in which a person was brought up are frequently put under strain by this transit, which makes a person critical and disinclined to accept prevailing views and attitudes.

A change of locality is likelihood during a transit of Uranus to H 3, and most commonly occurs as Uranus approaches the last degrees of the house.

By Progression

When Uranus moves through the Third House by progression, a person’s reality is subjected to major revision, as is the case with the transit. Much that, hitherto, had been accepted without question is examined and rejected, although this process takes place over a much longer period than is the case with the transit. Over time he is likely to put a greater distance between himself and the people, circumstances and ideas, which have formed his reality in his earlier years. Physical estrangements and removals may have a part to play in this process.

By the time Uranus leaves H 3 a person is likely to have changed his views and outlook in a very substantial way.

This is happening to me already.  I have been questioning who I am and what I believe and why I and why I believe in such things.  I relaize that my whole life is based on the cultural and soceity moldings of where I live, who I have been in contact with, and it is rather a flat characterization of who I really am. I can not fit myself into someone else' mold and views of who or what I am suppose to be anymore.

What I see is that the world is very big place with billions of poeple from all over with different views, different cultures, beliefs and languages.  Not everyeone sees things the same way.  My beliefs have all been formed by American Television but is this really the way the world is.  No


It has been hard but I'm starting to let go of TV and movies, and all those things that once excited me and I guess I want to go more to books.  I miss reading. I used to read a lot when I was younger and even though words are made up by a writer with a distinct person vision the way the words work in everyone's minds is different.  There I can create the world as I want to and I don't have to be a slave to anyone else interpretation.


I have always felt like a round peg trying to fit in a square hole.  Maybe I just need to find a different place, mind, space, world, that I fit in.  LIke the bumblebee girl from the Blind Melon song, "No Rain."

Mariah Carey-Fantasy lyrics

Beating the Beast of Creativity...Writer's Block

Image via WikipediaCreativity comes and goes.  For creative people we are always looking for the muse.  That inspiration that will drive us to create art, books, movies, songs, etc.  When we find it we use to the point where we begin treating like a mule or some other beast of burden; screaming at it to work for us, make us some money, bring us our happiness in form of fame, fortune, love (Cyrno D' Bergerac) or some other tangible want.

Creativity then becomes angry and scared and wants to leave and often times it leaves without a trace and then we are left alone and lonely.  Scared.  What do we do now.  Well we have to go do something different  that will coax the muse back to us.  Usually anything that will ignite the senses and psychic energies will do.  Going on a trip, going on a roller coaster, a near death experience, or even just having an altercation with someone.  I can't tell you how many crazy cool ideas I've had after a bad experience with someone.  My mind goes into over drive and the ideas come rushing in.  I think it has more to do with me expressing my true self in those moments rather than laying down the tracks and letting the train pass over me.

Creativity hates fear, it hates cowards.  If you are coward you better learn to be brave or else creativity will never come for you.  You have to be willing to go into the dark underworld in the astrology it could be called the twelfth house in mythology it would be deemed as Hades.  Go into hell and back and see what you come back with.  Will win you the respect of Creativity.

Just don't go over board and abuse it again when it does come back.  You have to respect it or in the end it can bite you in the ass.

Falling in love...A Saturn Transit

Falling in love is about physical chemistry with the infatuation period lasting about 2½ years ~ the length of time for a typical Saturn transit. After the 2½ year honeymoon, most couples have to get down to the business of loving each other ~ past the chemistry and hormones. If you don’t love the warts, too, you never really loved at all.

Time to Relax

Image via WikipediaFollowing the cycles of life can be worth while.  There are times when life is at full speed like I had last week with two photoshoots, Xmas, Xmas shopping,  working long hours and many days at my day job while spending my free time processing and being creative post the photoshoot.  Now the photos are off to thier owners and I am at the back end of the wave slowing coming down with a nice cup of hot chai tea.

There is a rise and fall to everything but I think many of us never come down we just get on one wave and catch another and another without ever taking time to recharge.  So I'm going to take it easy for now till the next thing comes along.  Just going to enjoy the moments while I have them and take a breath and have some tea.

Quote: It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it. --- Lou Holtz

Wisdom comes from all walks of life...even football.  Quote: It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it. --- Lou Holtz Lou Holtz Quotes Lou Holtz Born January 6, 1937 American Football Coach A collection of Lou Holtz quotes. Enjoy these famous inspirational quotes by the famous football coach, Lou Holtz
					Don't be a spectator, don't let life pass you by. Lou Holtz, Life Quotes How you respond to the challenge in the second half will determine what you become after the game, whether you are a winner or a loser. Lou Holtz, Winner Quotes If you're bored with life - you don't get up every morning with a burning desire to do things - you don't have enough goals. Lou Holtz I never learn anything talking. I only learn things when I ask questions. Lou Holtz, Learning Quotes Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond to it. Lou Holtz The man who complains about the way the ball bounces is likely the one who dropped it. Lou Holtz Don't tell your problems to people: eighty percent don't care; and the other twenty percent are glad you have them. Lou Holtz A bird doesn't sing because it has an answer, it sings because it has a song. Lou Holtz Show me someone who has done something worthwhile, and I'll show you someone who has overcome adversity. Lou Holtz

Judge Actions..Words, not so much.

You want to judge someone judge them by their actions.  See what kind of person they really are based on what they do rather than just what they say.  It's a lot easier to lie with words than to lie with an act.

I am the only person I'm concerned about judging.  I have to see what is really important in my life by what I spent most of my free time doing.  It certainly isn't photography.  Maybe it learning, creating, or seeking mental stimulation.  I do spend a lot of time surfing the web time that could be used to work more to make more money to pay off my debt sooner or to get some sleep that I have been missing or time to work on goals and hobbies.


If I were to judge myself by my action I would say I am a dependable hard work that knows his routine well but suffers from time management retraints as his job takes a large portion of his time and it leaves less time for other important things like hobbies, goals, or cleaning house.  I have paid most of my bills on time but I tend to spend more than I make.

I am dedicated and honest to a degree when it comes to dealing with people but I hate being given the run around or the shit end of the stick as they say.  Once this happens I lose respect for the person I'm dealing with and I write them off.  This maybe be good or not so good business.

If I were to judge myself when it comes to dealing with people is I don't much from interacting with people that is why I've kept my interactions at a minimal .  There are rare moments when I find someone awesome to communicate with but something always goes wrong with it.  But that is life,  life goes on, and I go on too.

If I were to judge how others see me well I would say its not that important anymore.  As I know use to matter to me a lot but I learned that sometimes I'm better off being myself.

If I were to judge how I dealing with coworkers.  I think there some co workers where they come to work and they come to touch and feel and be at some party when its work.  And sometimes these needy people who need my attention who need me to listen to them all they do is suck the life out of me.

Comparison kills creativity

We learn by mimicking. Its how we learn to walk, talk, and do just about everything else.  There is nothing wrong with it at the beginning.

The problem the forms for creativity in mimicking or comparing our selves to other is that it creates unrealistic standards for us and even limits us from being ourselves trully and fully.

When I was writer, I would read all the great writers and want to be like them I was greatly disappointed when I could not write like Dumas, Dickens, King, etc.  I became unhappy, frustrated, and disillusioned with my abilities as a writer.  With music I did the same always trying to copy the sound of who ever was popular at the time.  With photography I compare my work to others all the time and even at times try to emulate someone else's style.


Comparison kills creativity.  Comparing yourself to other is hard thing to avoid because we want to strive to be like the best even though that is someone else's natural abilities and by living up to their standards we never really tap into our great natural abilities.

So I'm giving up comparing myself which is hard to do because I don't like to take risks and chances I don't like messing up but I figure its the only way to create anything that really comes from me even if it stinks it will be my creation and not something inspired by someone else and me simply trying to living up to someone else's style and abilities.

By not comparing work to others I will have the freedom to do what ever and not feel bad that it is not appropriate or standards.  Sure I might create a lot of garbage but I also might create something that is work of art.

Letting Go and the fear of losing control

Image by Lawrence Sinclair via FlickrI've had a bad case food poisoning the last two days with dashes to the bathroom every hour.  Its a pretty rotten feeling to not be able to control your bowels.  I got the cold sweats and the feeling of diarrhea.  I almost messed my pants at work I had to rush out of my job and head to the john to do my business. 

I remeber somewhere in psychology that this function of controlling our bowels serves as a guide lines to how we live our lives.  This is were the terms Anal retentive and Anal expulsive come in.

The term anal retentive (also anally retentive), commonly abbreviated to anal, is used conversationally to describe a person who pays such attention to detail that the obsession becomes an annoyance to others, and can be carried out to the detriment of the anal-retentive person:


An anal expulsive personality is broadly defined as exhibiting cruelty, emotional outbursts, disorganization, self-confidence, (sometimes) artistic ability, generosity, rebelliousness and general carelessness

What I learned about myself is that I tend to do a lot of forward thinking, worrying, and a lot of research to avoid failure.  Yesterday I had a photoshoot and the week before that I had spent many hours on flickr looking at different photo examples.  I even went out and bought some cheap props which I never even used and the photo ideas i got online,  I never used as well.

When I got there I simply adapted to the environment, my subjects and use my equipment to the best of my ability with the skills and knowledge that I have gotten from previous experiences.   My photolocation was a small bedroom with large mirror and an windows with large maple tree outside.  It was a gray cloudy day and the lighting was not that bright so i had to mix flash with natural light and also had to slow down my shutter a bit too much but also had shake reduction in the camera.  These are all the real life situations that I responded to.
In the end I think I got some really good shots and I hope they will like and enjoy them.


I realized what a waste of time and money it was to try to avoid a negative outcome by over studying.  Sure one might say that well maybe it helped some but in the end you just have to trust yourself and get in there and do it the best you can and stop trying to compare yourself to others.

This is hard because no one wants to fail but if you just let go things will take care of themselves.  Realize that you really have no control over that outside stuff, heck many people don't even have control over the inside stuff.  My letting go you let go of trying to win, of a previously conceived idea of what the prize or end looks like and you become open to infinity possibilities.

Creativity needs you to Get Bored

When i look back to the seventies, eighties, and even the early nineties I look at the amazing creativty that was abound.  From music, to movies, to just about anything from diets to work out machines, it seemed there was just an amazing overload of creativity and talent.

These days there is still creativity but it seems more technologically based and things like art and media seem a little boring or just not as engaging.  I think the root cause is that people are not as bored as they used to be.  There are just too many things to use up your time on to keep you from being bored enough to create.  In fact the impulse to keep boredom away is so powerful that as soon as a person feels the slightest bit of discomfort from boredom they are off on their cell phones, texting, webbing, or calling. 

Or on the computer playing games, surfing the web, or watching movies and videos.  We've become less creative or givers and more recievers or users.   So I'm planning on making myself really bored soon. Taking way a lot of the distraction that i use to combat boredom.  It will be hard.  I'm sure it will be as hard to curing an heroin addiction becuuse it all lnked to the same dopamine and serotnin response in the breain.  The brain feel discomfort must seek pleasure.
Must have stimulation no matter what it is.  This will be a hard road to follow but I will try.

Life Goes On...So live yours.

Some how we get involved with a lot of things in our lives.  Our jobs, our friends, our relaionships, our hobbies, and the list goes on and on. It hard to realize the idea that even if weren't there, involved with all this stuff, life still goes on.

I'm an advent visitor to a many photography blogs and forums to the point where they become parts of my life.  Sometimes I'm at work and can't wait to come home and see what's new on the blogs.  Sometimes I add to the comments and I feel like I'm part of it, like I'm an important part of it but now realizing that even if didn't do all this life would still go on and I would be none the worse because of it.

I among many other people always feel guilty for calling in to work even when I really am sick.  I feel that I need to be there, what will happen if I'm not there.  Am I going to miss out on something, are they going to take away my spot.  But the truth is life goes on. 

Sometimes all this stuff, the unimportant stuff that seems really important at the time consumes our lives and we feel that if we miss a day of it we will lose our lives.

With all the time we spend on this stuff I wonder how much better are lives are because of it.  But maybe our lives would be better if we devoted the time we spend on the unessential stuff on more essential stuff.  

Turning into an A-hole....Power corrupts

Image via WikipediaThere is a line from Back to the Future where Marty asks Doc why they had to go back to the Future, do they turn into assholes or something."

In the beginning of everthing there seems to be truth and honesty.  But as things get bigger and more expansive and more powerful...corruptions can occur

It occures with computures where the best system is the simplest like win98  but software has gotten bigger and easier to corrupt.

Now the Wiki leaks guy seems to have run away pushing an honest agenda and is more into becomeing famouse and rich. He has become and asshole to his co workers who have all jumped ship and started their own website.

But its not only money it also gaining power from information.  When a person becomes experienced enough he can become cocky and sure enough he'll become and asshole.  There was a guy at work who had probably one of the best cameras in the world today.  It cost about eight thousand dollars.  He told a coworker of mine that we shouldn't bother taking pictures of his daughter with the princess because our cameras were crap.  Later his wife came to see if we could take the pictures and he sat alone at the table like a big Asshole he was not thinking of anyone but himself.  This was his daughter's event and his big ego and power trip had ruined it for because while all the other little girls were getting their photos delivered at the table she had nothing thanks to her dad.  A hole, A hole, A hole.  The power had corrupted this man.

The movie the lord of the rings was centered on this idea with the character Smeagol wanting the ring.  He represents someone that has been corrupted by power. But just as Frodo who was pure of heart later fell to the power and he could not avoid being corrupted towards the end.  It was a heavy and impossible task or burden and it alsmost killed him but he made it through.

Buhhism is abut givng up want of anything which makes can help from becoming an Ahole in life.  We may not all become Buddist but we can learn to simply not let the power we have go to our heads.  Find a true and honest purpose and when we find ourselves doing things for simply ego and power then we need to step back and check ourselves.. or maybe its just part of life because eventually we all want something to the point where want to fill the void in our lives.

My Astroscope: Losing Your Head...Mercury Retrograde

Thinking, which is what I have always been good at has become difficult for me lately.  I've been taking the unsusaly long way about things instead the clear cut direct approach.  I think its the weather, the stress of the holidays, or maybe its that damn Mercury Retrograde.

Mercury rules thinking and I have not been able to think clearly.  Like today I took a picture of drawing and then spent an hour in photo shop trying to process it and it didn't turn out the way i like.  Then it dawned on me I have a scanner.  Sure enough the scanner did it in thirty seconds and I have what I want now.  Damn what's up with my mind.  It sucks what that tool you have counted on all your life becomes faulty.  I don't know what it is but I know that I have not been myself lately.

Here it is winter and a few weeks before Xmas and I had been trying to get into the holidays but haven't been able to just been cranky.  I realized its my back.  The cold weather tenses up my muscles around my back and I get irratable.  I have also been working a lot and have taken away all my pleasures or my negative reinforcements like fast food, eating out, buying stuff I don't need, and TV.  I guess I am left with a life without much Joy.  Time to go on a holiday, though I think my brain is all already there.

Your voice says it all...

Image via WikipediaBesides how a person look which is our first impression and response to a person when we first meet them or simply interact with them, thier Voice is the biggest clue to what kind of person they are.  No matter what a person looks like if they have a voice that demands authority you will respond to it.  If they have a voice of child you might now really respond to a demand or request. 

There is man at work who is in his fifties and he is the best at what our location because of his voice. There is something so hypnotic about it.

Bela Lugosi is synonymous with Dracula in fact the count on Sesame Street is inspired from Bela Lugosi.  When you hear him talk his voice captures you you feel almost hypnotized by it.  Its the same with many musicians who have a meek voice when they live in the real world but the moment they step on stage their magical voice steps in and they can inspire, motivate, energize, change the world.

Learning to use the right voice in the right situation can relaly help you.  My example is that I have a client that I have always been pretty nice too always complimented her and for some reason I think the tone of my voice was alwasy a bit young, childish or even feminine and I felt walked over by her.  After a bad experience my voice is a little more firm hoarse when I deal with her, it's a lot more serious and than jovial and I sense there is tremendous power shift on my behalf.  Where before I came across as if she was doing me a favor now I feel like i am the one with power and I notice that she was a bit taken back by it.  The power of the voice really comes along.  I think a person who can master their tone of voice and learn to use the right voice for the right occassion could possibly do anything he wanted to...he would have ultimate power.

My Alternative to Coffee...Hot Water

I've been a fan of coffee for a long time.  I used to drink it so much as a kid I had a nervous breakdown literally I could not stop shaking.  It was pretty scary I was just so cold it was the caffeine in Mexican coffee...we were on vacation and I would drink it three or four times a day.

Lately I've noticed some back and kidney problems from drinking too much coffee, beer, and sodas.  Turns out these types of drinks can lead to kidney and other organ problems because they can shock the organs and render them sluggish. 

So I was talking to a freind of mine about an alternative to coffee and she recommended tea or hot cocoa but still for me this wasn't what I was looking for.  I started to think that I wanted something like coffee just not like tea, and not like hot cocoa.  I anaylzed what it was about coffee that I liked and I relaized that I like the heat. 

So today I tried some hot water and sure engough i felt as if I had drunk a cup of coffee.  I don't have problems with energy so I'm not keen on the caffeine but a cup of hot water warmed me up and picked up my energy really quick.  I think this will be my new alternative to coffee just a cup of hot h2o

Dealing with Stress of Success

Accepting success can be a difficult thing.  It requires change.  It requires us to change our lives, like...heck when I was a failure I could lie in bed all day and watch cartoons now I have to call clients and set up meetings.  Life can get complicated really quick.

Success requires you to deliver.  Sure you can dream about success but in the end you have to know what you are doing, you have to have the right tools to do them, and lastly but most important you have deliver with your goods and services.

Success has been out of my reach for a long long time.  I was more prepared for it a decade ago than I am now.  But lately I have had clients calling me out of the blue to schedule events.  There is a tendency in me to self sabotage or want to self sabotage all because success is very scary.  When I look at me I am used to staying home after work and just watching to relaxing now I'm out and about taking pictures and here and there working with people I don't really know.  Its all a lot of change...a lot to take in, and it gets very stressful.

For me it also comes down to confidence like driving the car for the first time, once you get that one time under you belt then you can say hey I can do this.  I shot an event last night.  It was my first event where I felt like I knew what i was doing.  I have shot events before but this was my first Xmas party at a club.  It was interesting.  I'm not your average person when people see me they always have to pass a judgemental glance almost asking can this guy really pull it off.  But I have the skills and I have now the confidence in my tools.  Which is the best thing any service man can have.  If you can believe in you tools, in yourself, then you are unstoppable.  I remember reading about this photography who once for got his hear or maybe it was lost on a plane so he improvised and shot everything on his cell phones sure it sounds good but he had the top of the line cell phone camera.  He chose the phones for its camera capabilities first, for its communication's abilities seconds.  the pictures came out really good and many photographers wanted to know what cell phoens he was using. to get one themselves.  But really have the right tools, knowing how your equpement works, will save you a lot of headaches. It is a relationship in its self.

But still dealing with Success can be tiring, and it is easy to run away from it to the comfort of failure because our lives don't have to change but then again if you always do what you've always done you'll alwasy be where you are.  Ask yourself is where you are now really such a pretty place...is there somewhere you want to get to, somewhere else you'd rather be, live, etc.  I would think ..YES

Yoda: The darkside, Wu Wei, Morpheus, Bruce Lee

Run! Yes. A Jedi’s strength flows from the Force. But beware of the dark side. Anger... fear... aggression. The dark side are they. Easily they flow, quick to join you in a fight. If once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny, consume you it will, as it did Obi-Wan’s apprentice.

How can we achieve this state. Only by truly letting go of striving for, let what will happen happen and not trying to control things. We can try to change reality but this is not in harmony with the way. Only by truly letting go can we let life happen as it should. Wu Wei.

Everything that happens, happens and couldn't of happened any other way. We can question why things happen as they are but it would be simpler to simply accept them as they and move on with it.

Sometimes there are no simple answers but it simply easier and more in harmony to just go with the flow. Flows like water, reflect like a mirror, and responds like an echo live in harmony with the Tao:


This brings us back to Chuang-tse‘s riddle. What flows like water, reflects like a mirror, and responds like an echo? A life lived in harmony with the Tao:
* Flows like water —
Water flows over and around obstacles. It does not resort to force to destroy the obstacles in its path. One might say that the Taoist plays the cards that have been dealt to her, instead of sulking or demanding a new deal.

In the background of this riddle we can see P’u, the principle of the Uncarved Block (described in part one). Taoists orient their actions to Things As They Are — not Things As They Might Have Been, or Things As We Would Have Preferred Them.

* Reflects like a mirror —
A mirror does not distort; it accurately represents whatever is before it (blemishes and all!). The Taoist (like the Buddhist) tries to see what is actually there before him.

It is more difficult than it sounds! Human beings constantly interpret reality in accordance with our prior expectations, and thereby introduce distortions / illusions. As George Orwell observed, “To see what is in front of one’s nose needs a constant struggle”.

* Responds like an echo —
An echo does not generate sound, it merely deflects it. (Not unlike the mirror, which does not generate light but reflects it.)

My AstroLife: Uranus Squre Mars...The Devil Inside...

I never thought I'd be into Astrology but out of all things in the world it really has helped explain a lot of things with me.  I'm sure religion has done the same for other, as well as zen philosophy or even listening to the beatles as I truly believe that everything can be defined by everything.

I'm going to start a little segment in this blog about Astrology and how my life is going according to how the astro energy out there.  Sure many can say this stuff is nothing but coincidences but then who cares what other have to say.  This is about me.

Got some wild energy out there.  Uranus squares Mars.  According to a lot of Astrology Blogs  this combination creates a rather unexpected surge of energy particular anger.

I've been angry lately.  Not in a bad way but in way that I've been seeing though all the bullshit in the world from people at work, to my family members and even my freelance clients.  I'm a very controlled person and usually keep my feeling locked up inside in fact most of the time I'm so detached I don't feel anything about anything.  I'm numb but in a good way. Lost in a wold of fantasy and dreams which could be my Uranus in my 12 house or the fact that Uranus has been in Pisces for the last 7 years as I look back this is pretty much when all this started...my quest for knowledge, escapism, and the internet addiction.

But these last few days it's all been coming up and I haven't been holding it back.  I told my mom off today for not respecting my time.  She feels she can call and get me to do stuff for her when ever she wants.  Sometimes I feel like her product as if I"m something that she owns and she can do what ever she wants with me and I must obey.  I think I have let this go on and I have a Libra ascendant and these type of people are known to be people p leasers and somewhat always want to keep things free of conflict.  This trait can be helpful but it can also be hurtful as you never seem to get what you want and people tend to see you as a nice guy who never makes any trouble so as Rodney Dangerfield use to say "I don't get no respect."

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So I told her to stop calling me all the time.  I felt guilty but I also felt happy as I had gotten it off my chest.  This left me with a lot of time to get a lot of stuff done and when I was done I called her and we did something.

I also have this fire in dealing with a client that is a bit overwhelmed and hard to communicate with.  Usually I try to be as formal and as to not push any buttons (Libra again...people pleaser) but this Mars square Uranus really got to me and I was a bit mean but honest.  I told her how I felt because I had been feeling used, disrespected and not valued in our business affairs as if my time, life, and skills did not matter and I had been forgotten.   She apologized for the mistakes and hopefully future business dealings will be better.  I am also adding more structure in my business affairs by using contracts.  (Saturn in Libra working here)  I think the big issue with me is always being so self sacrificing, people pleasing, and overly giving.   This Mars square Uranus is letting me to tell it how it is and it is feeling good to finally feel like I have a say in all this.

There is also a New Moon in Sagittarius that deals with new beginnings and well this is a new beginning for me and I have to see how it all works out.

Uranus Direct Dec 5 2010...Suprises and Freedom

Uranus is the shocking planet that rules freedom.  It has been retrograde for the last six months and today it finally awakens and begins its trek forward back into Aries.

Currently Uranus is in the sign of Pisces which falls in my second house, my house dealing with money specifically earned income.  Today I was suppose to photograph an event at a church.  It had been planned for several weeks, I even went out and bought some clothes for it.  I had also finally finalized my camera gear for the event.

It all started out good till halfway down the freeway there was massive traffic as all four lanes had been reduced to one.  Then about half way there I realized I forgot my camera bag with my sd cards, extra camera body, and other lenses. No problem. I had my working camera and full set of batteries and knew I could get through it.  I just needed to stop into a drug store and buy a extra memory card...here I'm expecting 10 dollars maybe 15 dollars at the most for a memory card.. NO they wanted 30 dollars...what a fucking surprise.

So i pass on the idea of  buying a new card and simply decided to lower the size of the pixels and get more pictures on the card.  So when I get to the church there is no one there.  The doors are locked.  I call my client and she says she is not there and that she has gone home to change.  So I tell here since there is no one there I"m going to go home and grab the bag I left.  She says fine.  It takes me 45 minutes to get my bag and get back to the church.  When I arrive now it is pitch dark the lights are off and there is not one car in the parking lot.  Its 6:30 and i decided to wait till seven.  No one showed.  So I went home.  I little perplexed, not at all sad, mad, or disappointed...I feel relieved.   Sure I missed out on some money but today was my day off and here I am doing an event when I could have gone to hang out with some people who matter to me.
Mercury is also going in to retrograde which deals with communication and transportation which could explain all the complication with traveling to this gig and as well as communicating with the client.  Since this event did begin during the Mercury shadow period. 

But..Uranus in my second house has plagued me with unexpected surprises and expenses when it comes to my income.  Still with these surprises it often works it a way to liberate.  I will not be doing business with this client anymore but I am happy that I did work with her a bit has I got some wonderful shots that I can use in my portfolio.  But I feel liberated and free from obligations.  I have a full time job so is this going to hurt me...not in the least, maybe somehow its what I wanted all along.  Uranus knew it and it did what it does best...liberate.